Means to an end?
So here's my dilemma.
I'm currently in college, studying to get a BFA in photography and in my third year. But for more than half a year now, I've been feeling completely demotivated to do anything school related. I think in part, it has to do with not being able to take my major classes and being stuck to do general ed and foundation classes instead. It also has to do with the stress I am getting from the financial status of my family and their inability to plan .
So instead, I've been taking time off. Of course, I haven't been slacking and wasting my time... instead, I've been taking an internship at Lifestyle Asia HK and working part time tutoring to pay my rent. I've been enjoying myself tremendously and learning so much through real life experience and it's just so different from the classroom environment. I get a lot of artistic freedom and I don't feel like I'm shackled down by grades. I don't have to worry for entire months about whether one class will bring down my GPA but rather deal with projects as they come with enthusiasm and fresh eyes.
Yes, I should see college as a means to an end (oh my word, the number of times people have said that to me), but it's so torturous and I hate doing things when I'm not into it... It just becomes something I want to sabotage instead (which is what I've been doing).
Maybe it's time to take a break from school and come back when I'm ready so I can tackle it with enthusiasm and an aim to succeed.